Psychological Support for Children Facing Online Abuse

The internet has improved our lives in many ways, but it has also become an unexpected source of problems. Today, more than ever, online abuse is a serious and growing problem. In the digital world, children can be abused in a variety of ways. Children use the Internet to learn, play, and socialize. The abuser knows this very well and they also know that children often use the Internet without the help of an adult. So it's no surprise that abusers are venturing into the digital world. 

Definition of online abuse

Using technology, cyber abusers often threaten and annoy their victims. Online abuse can be presented in many ways and includes: 

• Bullying  
• Identity theft 
• Publishing someone's personal information 
• Sharing photos without permission 
• Creating a blog or a website about someone 
• Posting videos of victims of bullying 

Impact of cyberbullying

Because it happens in the "virtual" rather than "real" world, people sometimes underestimate the magnitude and severity of these situations. But just like traditional bullying, we need to be aware and careful about online bullying. Cyberbullying can take many forms and none should be overlooked.

Children often feel helpless and scared because the abuse happens online, day and night, and sometimes they don't even know who the abuser is. Because abusers tend to share private and sometimes even false information about their victims, children can feel humiliated, and the abuse can greatly affect their confidence. 

Cyberbullying doesn't just have negative consequences for victims; it is also worrisome for parents whose children are the target of abuse. In fact, parents often think they are going to fix the problem by banning the use of technology to end the abuse. But this approach does more harm than good. 

One of the scary facts is that anyone can become the target of an abuser. Fortunately, there are things you can do as a parent to reduce the risk of your child being bullied. 

Steps parents can take  

Like every parent, you don't want your child to be cyberbullied. Luckily, there are steps you can take to significantly reduce the risk of this happening. 

1. Understand the technology:

Without understanding the techniques and tools used by abusers, it will not be easy to detect the abuse.  Sit down and talk to your child. Let him show you his favorite websites and social networks. Learn how these sites work and how children interact with each other. Ask your child why a particular site is so popular and why they like to use it.     

2. Communicate with your child and set boundaries:

Often, online abuse begins when the child uses the Internet in the wrong way, this is why communication is key to set boundaries and offer the child the needed psychological support: 

• Explain to your child that you expect him to be polite online.
• Prohibit the use of offensive names, curses, and the sharing of offensive opinions.
• Tell your child that posting inaccurate information about other people is bad, and remind them of the importance of keeping secrets and not sharing them with others.
• Teach them not to respond to annoying messages and other bullying, but to show them to you immediately.  
• Make a detailed plan about the online behaviors and boundaries that the children should follow and let the whole family participate.

In addition, set an age limit for the use of specific websites. For example, many parents don't allow their kids to use Facebook until they're 13. If you are one of these parents, be sure to explain to the children why you are setting such a limit.   

Also, use technology to protect your child from possible online abuse. Parental controls, internet filters, etc. can help in this regard.   

3. Keep an eye on your child’s screen:

A child is less likely to be involved in cyberbullying if they feel they are being watched while using the Internet. With that in mind, always keep an eye on their screen. Also, warn them not to share confidential information with strangers, such as name, school, address, phone number, etc, and always be prepared to answer your child’s questions. 

Moreover, help your child create social media accounts and other profiles, and always be aware of their passwords. Add your child as a friend to all the pages they use and keep track of their activities. Also, tell your child that you have the right to read all of their messages, emails, text messages, and anything tech-related.   

4. Know how to deal with online abuse:

If your child becomes the target of abuse, advise him not to respond immediately, and show him how to block or report the abuser on social media. You should also keep copies of all messages, emails, and usernames used by the abuser, and most importantly change the settings to only specific people to tag your child. 

If the child receives threats or is bullied, report the abuser to the site. If the bullying concerns the school in any way, don't stop at the report you submit to the principal, but keep a track of what's going on and ask for a written plan of action that the school will take.

Don't blame your child, and do not in any way unfairly prevent your child from using technology. If your child begins to show signs of depression or other symptoms, consider seeing a counselor or doctor for them. 

According to experts: “Cyberbullying cases are as individual as the people involved. So our general advice is not to react or retaliate, block the “bully,” and print out and keep evidence in case it’ll be needed – can help in some cases. But the most important thing to do is talk with your kids about what’s going on, help them think through what happened, how they feel about it, and what they’re going to do about it. No one knows how to resolve a situation without understanding it fully. It’s important to involve your child in the process, not just take over yourself, because the main goal is to help him or her strengthen the self-confidence that might’ve been shaken and restore a sense of physical and/or emotional safety.” 

In conclusion, internet security and online safety should play a big role in house rules and preventing online abuse is an ongoing process. Therefore, talk to your children on this subject and explain it using examples from everyday life, and explain why it is important to follow certain Internet safety rules. By setting limits and expectations, you keep your child safe, but also provide them with fun, educational, and safe use of the Internet.